Monday, October 17, 2005

I said a Banana Nutrament, man. Not a glass of wine.

Apparently the cops in DC have now decided that you can be arrested if driving after one glass of wine. That shit is redonkulous and needs to be stopped. Thankfully some associates of mine are working with a friendly DC Council member to get a new law proposed very very soon.

And if you think cops cracking down on people who have one drink is bad, the FBI is actually diverting people away from homeland security to crack down on parno. And they are risking our homeland security not to bust kiddie parno, but the kind made by and for consensual adults according to the W.Post. The FBI has actually started an "anti-obscenity squad" that has been described as "one of the top priorities" of Bush crony Attorney General Alberto R. Gonzales. ((I think a lot of the policies of this administration are obscene but I have no squad to stop it. ))

((True story involving a very bad joke on this item: I actually overheard James Carville say to Tommy the GM at the Palm [how is that for name dropping] “The FBI created this squad because they are looking for weapons of mass erections.” Why does he remind me of quagmire....giiiiggity .))

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An attorney at my previous firm has an autographed picture of Dick Cheney smirking on his bookcase. Everytime I walked by the thing I couldnt help but cringing, and I always thought the guy’s eyes were following me around the room. Well this may be the sweetest revenge on that damn photo. Cheney himself may be targeted by the Prosecutor in the Valerie Plame leak case. Cheney, Libby, Rove, Frist, Delay, Abramoff -- ohh please dont make it stop.

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After hours of CNN, MSNBC, and Discovery Times - I still love me some trash-reality tv, so is there anyway I could resist a Kill Reality Director’s Cut DVD. If this animal is ever offered on my RCN pay-per-view on-demand there is no doubt I would purchase.

I mean how can you resist watching reality "stars" like the Real World's Tonya and Trishelle participating in coke fueled orgies while getting dumps taken on them by an idiot named Johnny Fairplay. I’m all over this thing.

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Internets Geekiness alert. Skip ahead to the next line of asterisks to avoid the geeky goodness.

RSS aggregating is the bizzomb. If your blog, website or news-service doesn’t have RSS capability, I probably don’t read it. I use the live bookmarks on firefox constantly, and I also use “My Yahoo” to aggregate all of my blogs and websites into one readable place. Now Google, in its continuing quest to take over the world, has added the Google Reader.

I know, with My Yahoo and live bookmarks, it seems like I have no need for Google Reader but it has some advantages over My Yahoo - so guess what - I use them all. You can never have too many portals to the internets, and it keeps you from having to check all the sites every day. How else would you know when some big brown guy who rarely updates his blog tatoos an obscure Simpsons symbol on his arm.

Google Reader is a little different from My Yahoo because it takes all of your websites and puts the full posts in one place to read without clicking out, and then puts the postings from all of the sites in chronological order from newest to latest. Therefore I can be reading stories from national blogs like huffington post and see a story on Donkies soccer jump up to the top. It takes a while to get all the sites loaded but about one full day after loading it up, you can simply go to the Reader homepage throughout the day, and the newest posts from all your favorite blogs pop right up. As of now, My Yahoo is still the best for me, but once I get google reader totally figured out, it may take the cake.


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Ever since I made the Flying Spaghetti Monster the mascot for my fantasy football team, the FC Donkies, the team has seemingly been cursed. The injuries started piling up quickly: my #1 keeper (deuce) - out for the year; 1st draft pick (cadillac) - injured & out again; 2nd draft pick (h.ward) - injured and out; 3rd draft pick (a.johnson) - injured and out; Next RB taken (duce s.) - hasn’t played all year. I thought the FSM was trying to get back at me for something, but then he took my team of backups and led them to another victory this weekend, so the FSM is still pasta-riffic.

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Apparently FSM is watching over the other Donkies teams too, as they keep rolling along. Donkies football in 1st place . Donkies soccer in 1st place. Donkies kickball in the final four.

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The following is a direct quote from a personal love-letter sent from our newest Supreme Court nominee to Dubya, while Dubya was governor of Texas:
You are the best governor ever.”
HAHA. I don’t know what kinda judge she will be but this sure proves her blockbuster ability to (not) judge people.

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These DCist maps are pretty tight. They have basically taken Google Maps and imbedded each metro station onto a map of DC. Once there, you can put in your own location-points onto the map and then save the map as a web page - and link to it with a simple URL. Money.

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The beer looter that I analyzed a few weeks ago now has his own homepage. There are some messed up photoshops on that mugg, but I think with Deuce McCalister injured and out for the year I may need him in my backfield.




Oh man with looter guy in my starting backfield I will NEVER lose. I bet he will make the pro bowl for the next 20 years. Looter guy would run right over the Burger King/Deion and take it to the house every time.

4 Comments:

At 8:52 PM, Blogger She was shaken and stirred said...

that is ridiculous. I'll be sure to do all my drunk driving in vegas.

 
At 1:08 PM, Blogger rockstarjoe said...

Have I mentioned lately how excellent your blog is? Good stuff in this post! Thanks for the link to the Google Reader, I've been waiting for them to come up with something like that.

 
At 2:05 PM, Blogger The Redonkulous Linker said...

Thanks for the props RSJ. I wouldn't keep writing all this crap if people didn't tell me it was worth reading, so I appreciate it.

 
At 5:50 AM, Blogger subcontinental.giant said...

Yes. Shot outs rule.

Good post. I've actually been waiting for that Google thing as well.

You saw the cajun ragin' at the Palms ? Did you yell anyhting at him like how he lost a debate to Frank the Tank ?

 

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