Wednesday, October 05, 2005

Like a coin that won't get tossed, Rolling home to you

Three hot rumors today. My interest level in each of the three sadly shows that I may be turining into an old man with old man interests.

1) Nick and Jessica are rumored to be split, but this is quickly denied by their publicists. Big shocker, Fox news rushed to report without confirming. Not terribly exciting news, but hey its a good rumor.

2) Later in the day word comes down that a Britney sex tape will be hitting the streets imminently. Now this is a little more like it. There aren’t too many guys I know who wouldn’t wait in a long line, or at least in a queue on BitTorrent, to peep the Britney flick. Hell, five years ago peeps woulda been shelling out tons of cash for just a black and white, night-vision, paris-hilton style Britney flick.

3) But for some strange reason it is the third unsubstantiated rumor of the day that got me the most excited.
"The D.C. Rumor mill is thrumming with whispers that 22 indictments are about to be handed down on the outed-CIA agent Valerie Plame case . . . we have a bit of advice for Rove: Go with vertical stripes, they’re way more slimming."
Wow! This is the news that this blog has been awaiting for months and months. I have no idea if this is true on Rove, but oh please oh please oh please let it be true.

But what about my ranking of the rumors? IS it strange? Old man take a look at my life I'm a lot like you.

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Well, since my last post the flying spaghetti monster has struck again.

One game after guiding two hail-mary’s into the arms of Santana Moss, the FSM directs a Seattle Seahawks FG straight into the left upright and CLANG. Then 5 minutes later he guides a kick from our Maryland rook straight down the middle as I watch on from the 5th row. The Redskins win again, all hail the power of the FSM. (Meanwhile, Gibbs admits to missing the final kick while he was on his knees praying. I’m sure the spaghetti monster would have allowed him to watch that kick, you don’t have to close your eyes to pray to your Pasta-master coach Joe)

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The other big news since my last post: Bush was forced to pick a replacement on the Supreme Court and reached out to much respected and esteemed jurist....no wait, he picked his close friend and personal lawyer. Hahaha.

Conservatives all over the internets are hitting Bush harder than even us liberal communist frenchies, so I will let them have their fun

George Will:
“her nomination is not a defensible exercise of presidential discretion to which senatorial deference is due.” The Miers appointment risks "reducing the Supreme Court to a private plaything useful for fulfilling whims on behalf of friends”

Rod Dreher:
“I fully expect that if Justice Stevens retires, President Bush will nominate his dog Barney to fill that vacant seat. After all, who can a man trust to be loyal more than his dog?”

Ponnuru from NRO:
It's an inspiring testament to the diversity of the president's cronies. Wearing heels is not an impediment to being a presidential crony in this administration! I can only assume that the president felt that his support was slipping in this important bloc, and he had to do something to shore it up.

What they have to realize is what I believe Americablog said best
“You vote for an idiot, and big surprise he makes idiotic decisions.”

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If you're heading to Saint Ex be sure to keep the collars down

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Lastly, I’m thinkin about rasterbating something for my house

I think this would look pretty tight, what do you fools think?:

2 Comments:

At 11:34 AM, Blogger rockstarjoe said...

I don't know which gives me more wood... the thought of a Britney sex video or the thought of Bush, Dick, and Rove getting marched off to prison. I know I've been waiting for both for about five years. And I know I predicted that both would eventually happen. And in all fairness, both have taken WAY LONGER than they should have.

I guess I'd have to go with the frogmarch, if I had to choose. But what a tough choice it was!

Anyway, it's cool. Even if Bush gets in big trouble with the law, his buddies Roberts and Meirs will just find some way to pardon him.

BTW, that rasterbator thing is awesome!! Makes me wish I had a printer.

Go SKINS. FSM has our back.

 
At 6:58 PM, Blogger dumpoplex said...

Your list is like a probe into my mind.

I don't know if this post-dates your list--but what about our boy Fred Smoot and his boat party/gathering/twat-diving competition? The Vikings have single-handedly become the most ridiculous team in the league. Remember when everything was Randy Moss' fault? I think they still have a head coach who forces his players superbowl tix so he can scalp 'em, the first player to use the wizzinator, and the floating strip-a-torium. Randy doesn't have anything on them.

 

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