Sunday, March 04, 2007

Welcome to Costco, I love you

Thanks again to Videosift, I just stumbled accross the latest movie that I MUST see. Mike Judge’s Idiocracy. This movie apparently pissed of the studio so much (Fox) that it was pulled from theaters shortly after release and made approximately $35.

The plot, as best I can tell, involves an average man and woman being frozen in a government experiment in the present, and mistakenly left frozen for .about 500 years - until 2505. During those five generations, stupid people have continued to breed like crazy, while intelligent people have decided not to continue breeding nearly as a much. As a result we are left with an incredibly stupid population, run almost entirely by commercial interests, and our language has devolved into a mixture of hillbilly and inner-city slang.

Just take a look at Fox News of 2505 (the dude sounds EXACTLY like Shephard Smith by the way)

Also, my law school diploma would mean nothing when others have graduated from the prestigous school of law at Costco. which is the size of a small city..Costco rocks. I think the next couple entries in this post may demonstrate why this future is possible.
The President in that future will likely be today’s, and everyday’s, worst person in the world....Ann Coulter.
Three days ago Coulter took the stage at the Conservative gathering CPAC, and called Democratic Presidential contender John Edwards a faggot. This is actually a top political conservative conference (this week not in some dystopian future), in which a bestselling conservative author and pundit: introduced a Presidential candidate, got a standing ovation, and called the oopposing party’s candidate a faggot

If you watched the “joke” she didnt directly call him a faggot, said she cant talk about him, because she cant say “faggot,” which apparently is some kind of Republican joke. I only know this is supposed to be some joke because the “conservatives” in attendance cheered and laughed...loudly. Go GOP go.
A couple posts ago, I brought you the Caveman’s Crib, featuring the only commercial I currently enjoy, the Geico Caveman. Now the hype has built and the Caveman is going to get his own sitcom on ABC. (I don’t know if they will be able to pull it off, but it cant be worse than “According to Jim.”) Also in the works, I hear that the Aflac Duck and the Geico Gecko are getting a three-person Crossfire-type political show on CNN with Tucker Carlson. Woot.
Glbert Arenas continues to show why he should be everyone’s favorite NBA player, regardless of his recent play. His latest blog entry is chock full of reasons why blog readers and geeks must hold him in the highest regard, and even includes reference to Redonkulous favorite Chuck Klosterman. For some reason Gilbert even seemed excited that Klosterman calls him a rockstar. NBA players are not supposed to give a shit about Chuck Klosterman.

Klosterman then penned a great story on Gilbert for the new New York Times Sports Magazine, and started a debate with the great Post Sports Bog on whether Arenas is weird or not. The debate was furthered by this True hoop Klosterman interview on Gilbert

I think the basic consensus is that Gilbert is extremely weird for a NBA superstar, but only because he is not a boring and one-dimensional product placement marketing scheme, which most NBA superstars are. Its ok to be a quirky blogger and still be considered “normal,” but if you retain that quirky bloggerness as an NBA superstar, then you are instantly weird. NBA superstars are supposed to be MJ, King James, and Tiger Woods style pitchmen and not have emotions or personalities, otherwise they would be weird.
Agent Zero and the Wizards have been missing Jamison and Butler, 2 of the “big 3", up until their last couple wins, so they have been in a mini-slump...... but the Terps have more than picked up the slack.

Yesterday the Terps completed the sweep of the entiere state of North Carolina (inluding two recent victories over Duke as the Dukchebags in the stands were left trying to heckle Greivis Vasquez in Spanish about Hugo Chavez – it didnt rattle him one bit)

Meanwhile Mease is loving this recent Maryland turnaround
and has directed me to the GARY WILLIAMS SONG webpage on "You’re the man now dog" as a tribute to Garyland. HIT it, YTMND gary song.
In fake gangsta news from BWE, Scott Storch goes after Timbaland with the worst diss video since Jin dissed rosie o’donnell . Way to keep it gangsta Jin, I myself will hold back on any Rosie diss albums as long as she continues to make Elizabeth Hasslebeck cry
Finally, I remarked a couple posts ago that almost 10,000 people had looked at this site thanks in large part to a .gif of a college basketball coach biting the head off of a child. Although in the past I have drafted long and though-out posts regarding politics, religion, the Washington Wizards, science, and documentaries, that shit gets absolutely no traffic - and I am totally fine with that.

But something else changed here and about another 600 people have clicked on this site since last weekend. Internet lurkers have now flocked here in search of incorrectly spelled parno material. The phenomenon I speak of, is the Antonella Barba story from last week.

It seems that my misspelling of Ms. Barba’s first name as “Anotella” instead of “Antonella” has caused this blog to be a hot destination for the spelling challenged parno seekers.

Well, I hope the link to the site for the racy pics, satisfied all of the horny lurkers for nude american idol contestants, and this week- as an experiment in readership - I will again link to another Antonella Barba site.

The other popular site to featuring nude and topless pictures of Antella Barba, um topless pictures of Anotella Barba, um topless pictures of Antonella Barbara, um topless pictures of Antonela Barba, um topless pictures of Atonnella Barba, um topless pictures of Antonella Barbar, um pictures of Anotela Barba.... the nude photos are right here.


At 8:14 PM, Blogger BRYAN said...

Other names for Ms. American Idol Slut...Barbarella or Babar. If you get a copy of the Mike Judge movie let me know. I am sure it is great!

At 9:07 AM, Blogger rockstarjoe said...

I believe Idiocracy is available at a certain Bay run by Pirates... if you are so inclined to try before you buy.

The other day I got my haircut and I was the only customer at the shop. The next guy waiting after me was Gary Williams. I got to see him with wet hair. It was surreal.

At 11:40 AM, Blogger The Redonkulous Linker said...

2 questions"

1) isnt gary drenched by the conclusion of every game anyway?

2) you go to a "stylist" that washes your hair?

At 3:47 PM, Blogger subcontinental.giant said...

the moneyist barber is one that cuts your in your own shower....

At 4:25 PM, Blogger dumpoplex said...

I think Gilbert Arenas is the man. I wish he was the President of the United States.


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