Wednesday, June 14, 2006

The "All growns up" edition

This break in blogging has been even longer than than last break, but once again I have a great excuse. Last time it was Puerto Rico for my 30th bday and Delaware for Memorial Day. This time I had a trial in DC court, and BOUGHT A HOUSE. So, once again, I think I am excused for the lengthy break.
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As I have spent all my free time doing new-house-associated-activities I have no real substantive blog posts but tons of redonkulous-style linksy goodness


On the plane to Puerto Rico, I was [un]fortunate enough to have Big Momma’s House 2 as my in-flight movie. Now you may be thinking... “wow at the very least you know you will get a better in-flight movie on the way back.” Well, if you thought that you would wrong. Completely, utterly, and demonstrably wrong. In fact, I can guarantee that the movie on the return flight was no better than BMH2..... because that movie on the return flight was ALSO Big Momma’s House 2. I am completely serious – two straight flights featuring this Oscar worthy flick. Even for those who are fans of the recent comedic stylings of Martin Lawrence, this double-dip of Big Momma would seem to be too much to take. Luckily I had a laptop and a video ipod so we did not end up like this fateful flight – “Passengers Bravely Take Down Plane Showing Big Momma's House 2". ((On another note, it is pretty ballsy of the Onion to already dip into 9/11 for comedic effect)).
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I am no more likely to go see X-Men 3 in a movie theater than I was likely to see Big Momma’s House 2, but apparently the makers of X-Men picked up on this “I’m the Juggernaut Bitch” movie/internet phenomenon that I linked to a while a back (below the Tahj Holden post) and they actually incorporated the "You Tube" favorite into the movie.

Wiz Bang is referring this incorpation of bloggy humor into actual movies as the “snakes on a plane effect” where directors reshoot scenes simply to appease internet fans. Ill go with that, anyone think there is any chance that The Davinci Code Movie contains any reference to the Leprechaun in Alabama or just wanting to go for the gooooold.

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Here is the best choreographed remix of the lady punch video. Take me out.



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At least for a couple weeks there Stalkerati was the best way to stalk your friends and neighbors. The site could search myspace, friendster and others all with one click. Now it seems that myspace has found a way to block this search function, but Im sure they wont be stopped for long.
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Inside the NBA remains the best sports studio show on television, no doubt.
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Now that I bought a house and I'm becoming all growns up, is this what I have to look forward to?
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I dont think there is any way I could agree more with this rant against DC 101

A sampling
Fourth, we would be forced to brave our morning commute without the vapid chatter and hyena cackle of your pudgy (if intellectually emaciated) mascot, Elliot. Think of the potential damage to our collective IQ brought on by the sudden absence of his musings on beer, tits, and fags; some of us might learn to read in the time we would otherwise have spent furiously pounding the redial button on our phones, trying to win that new yellow H2, or those priceless front-row seats to see Tonic. Without you, there might be room on the dial for a station or two that actually cared about music, instead of a testosterone-fueled training program for the Future Drunk-Drivers of the National Capital Area (Hopelessly Inarticulate Division) masquerading as a worthwhile broadcast outlet. Lastly, but certainly not least, only those of us who have actually taken steps to procure Hoobastank's latest effort would have the opportunity to listen to the almost-Diane-Warren-quality ballad "the Reason" upwards of six times per day.

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Anyone looking to write a college essay or other personal statement, needs to look no further than this masterpiece

Small sampling:
"I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. I translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees, I write award-winning operas, I manage time efficiently. Occasionally, I tread water for three days in a row."

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Hopefully the blogging will pick up again soon, and I can bring you much better content than the above links. However, with everything going on in my life it is not likely. At least I still had wireless interenet in Puerto Rico (and cell phone service in El Yunque Rainsforest that was better than most service in Montgomery County) and I am getting ever close to my goal of reaching the end of the internets.
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Here is to hoping that Al Gore runs for President (and wins) and that Landon Donovan and the US team shows up against Italy (and at least ties). Word.

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