Friday, April 27, 2007

I'll be the water wings

I forgot to post this for the last couple weeks, but if you are getting back into Sopranos this seven minute video rolling through every single plot-line for each and every season in 7 total minutes is a must.....outstanding

Much better, although not nearly as ass-kicking as this musical asskicking video summary of the Die Hard series...yipppekayyaaa mutherfucker.
I know this Landlord video is a couple weeks old, but I had the pleasure of heairng Donkey McDonkerton attempt to recite it from memory about 8 times last weekend, and it is still good

Gilbert went off again on his blog last week and even gets into his potential co-presidency with Obama.
I will be in the Verizon Center tomorrow when Agent Zero hopefully unveils his surprise and makes 4 million dollars rain from the rafters. I also appreciate the Wizards tanking the first 2 games so I can get cheap tickets for the home games, as the Wizards prepare to win 4 straight and take out the Cavs.
Gerard G is a big fan of this video where a woman breaks down the details of penis power
This week the SCGiant, blogger of all design products and other assorted useless crap that I need, points me to a badass matchbook. Despite the fact that I have no need for matches, I might get one to keep in my pocket next to my money switchblade comb...those really impress the ladies.
Thanks to Gorilla Mask here is a link to the top ten Howard Stern gootube videos, and that site contains a link to over 200 other Stern clips. That Uber site also has a boatload of other top ten video lists including holloywood’s breast actresses. Ah the magic of the gootubes.
At the request of Mease and others I have to post this Cro Cop video. The Croation guy in this fight is the head of an Anti-terrorist swat team and a member of the Croatian parliament, in addition to being a professional asskicker, but you gotta watch this fight

This fight headlined a card that seems to have finally brought the sport of MMA into the sports and internets’ mainstream. The UFC couldnt get an HBO deal completed in time for this event, so they decided to air one of their regular pay-per-view shows on regular basic cable. I’ve been on this MMA/UFC bandwagon for a couple years now, and most other peoples didnt seem to notice, but after this free show my RSS reader started blowin up with sports fans who usually never mentioned the sport...first local sports talker Czaban was hyping the fight, also the twin kings of sports blogging With Leather and Deadspin jumped on board. As if that was not enough, I noted that the boxing section on CBS sportsline has become MMA/Boxing.

Thursday, April 19, 2007

I wanna know what's in.

Its tough to live in the DC area not be touched in some way, and have some connection to, the horrible tragedy at Va Tech. I thought about taking a week off from posting stupid videos, telling bloggy jokes, or publishing expletive filled political rants on the internets, but what good would that do. What I will do unlike so many others is hold off on jumping in with my policy remedies. I agree with Governor Kaine, before we start debating gun policy, or any other political solution, we need to simply step back for a bit and let people grieve. There will be plenty of time to assign blame and propose policies in the coming weeks and months. Now is NOT the time to pull an O’Reilly and try to use a tragedy to boost our pet issues. Even though I went to JMU, we are all Hokies this week.
With this Tech news, Iraq literrally blowing up, and everything else, at least one video from last weeks post seems pretty damn relevant

Now we will rejoin our regular Re-Donkosity, already in progress.
There are these so-called Kiai and Chi masters who believe that their mastery of the natural/supernatural martial arts is so strong that they barely need to touch their opponent to defeat them, and sometimes can knock them over without even touching the opponent. These guys have brainwashed their students and apparently brainwashed themselves. Here is what happens when one of those "masters" faces a real MMA athlete who is not brainwashed

The WizARDS literally limped into the playoffs, starting this weekend. The good guys were without 4 of their 5 best players for a few of the final games and this upcoming series with the Cavs could get ugly, but I still have faith.
Here is the missing wizards rundown: 1) Agent 0 - hurt, 2) Caron ToughJuice - hurt, 3) Jamison - only healthy star 4) Haywood - benched for attitude, 5) AD - hurt. Is it really possible to stay healthy all season and lose all your stars in the last month. As Buckhantz would scream... No! Not Possible! (Amazing YTMND link via Arvinomics, an untribute to the J-less Jarvis Hayes)
You wanna know how boring baseball is. In this video the announcers spend over three minutes breaking down a fan’s throwing of a pizza slice. High-larry-ish, and it beats any real baseball commentary, thats for sure. I could watch pizza throwing breakdown for hours more than baseball commentary, check the direction of the pizza - back and to the left, back and to the left.
I bet this is not the reaction that this kid wanted when he told him mom that he was an atheist. As punishment, maybe she will force him to eat some shrimp scampi on the way to hell, because as we all know – God strongly dislikes, no sorry, God HATES shrimp.
Don’t feel like checking your inbox for the latest goofy videos that people send? This single video collects a ton of them in one place

If your desk has a grommet hole, you gotta get these grommet accessories discovered by the SCGiant. I just doubled my lifetime use of the word "grommet".
It is finally supposed to stop raining and warm up this weekend. About damn time. I actually think the old Donkies(eys) softball team could blow these guys out, although we never got a full keg out onto the field. Maybe Ill watch the video for this outstanding song about 6 times on Friday and try to make it come true, outdoor sports are a must this weekend, either that or convince Agent Steinz to lead a pack of Wiz fans to Cleveland to trounce LeTravel James, only 6 hours to the home of the Dawg Pound.


Sunday, April 15, 2007

30 years of the Song of the Year - with video

Behold, the best song of every year from 1963 to 1993, with every damn video. This list is totally subjective, but totally accurate, although it changes every day. Let me know where you think I’m right or wrong, even though I'm never wrong.

1963 - Blowin’ in the Wind - Bob Dylan - The Freewheelin’ Bob Dylan
1964 - Don’t Worry Baby - Beach Boys - Shut Down Volume 2
1965 - A Change is Gonna Come - Same Cooke - Aint That Good News
1966 - Stuck Inside of Mobile with the Memphis Blues Again - Bob Dylan - Blonde on Blonde
1967 - A Day in the Life - Beatles - Sargent Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band
1968 - Sympathy for the Devil- The Rolling Stones - Beggars Banquet
1969 - What Is and What Should Never Be -Led Zepplin - Led Zepplin
1970 - Northern Sky - Nick Drake - Bryter Layter
1971 - Imagine - John Lennon - Plastic Ono Band or What’s Happening Brother/What's Goin On - Marvin Gaye - What’s Goin on
1972 - Heart of Gold - Neil Young - Harvest
1973 - Midnight Train to Georgia - Gladys Knight & the Pips - Imagination
1974 - No Woman No Cry - Bob Marley - Natty Dread
1975 - Thunder Road - Bruce Springsteen - Born to Run
1976 - Hurricane - Bob Dylan - Desire
1977 - Dreams - Fleetwood mac - rumors
1978 - So Lonely - The Police - Outlandos d'Amour
1979 - Refugee - Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers - Damn the Torpedoes
1980 - You Shook Me All Night Long - AC/DC - Back in Black
1981 - Waiting on a Friend - Rolling Stones - Tatoo You
1982 - Man Out of Time - Elvis Costello - Imperial Bedroom
1983 - Blister in the Sun - Violent Femmes - Violent Femmes
1984 - You Might Think - Cars - Heartbreak City
1985 - I Want The One I Can’t Have - The Smiths - Meat is Murder
1986 - Diamonds on the Soles of Her Shoes - Paul Simon - Graceland
1987 - Caribou - Pixies - Come on Pilgrim
1988 - Straight Outta Compton - N.W.A - Straight Outta Compton
1989 - Lovesong - The Cure - Disintegration
1990 - Been Caught Stealing - Janes Addiction - Ritual de lo Habitual
1991 - Come as You Are- Nirvana - Nevermind
1992 - Nuttin’ But a G Thang - Dr. Dre - The Chronic
1993 - Creep - Radiohead - Pablo Honey

Sunday, April 08, 2007

You ain't, principally cause you not.

As of my last post, the Wizards were slightly sputtering but still had high hopes for the playoffs and were holding on the #3 spot in the entire Eastern Conference. In case you live under a rock, or in Australia, you might not have known that the Curse of Les Boulez has sadly struck again and the Wizards have since lost both of their all stars- Tough Juice-Caron Butler, and the Internet’s Fave - Agent Zero. I have gotten over the intial depression of losing the half of the team within one week, and now I can remember what its like to be a real Bullets fan again

As you can I have not lost the faith and come playoff time you will be able to cath me at thePhone (Cal) Booth supporting Cal Booth, as the Wiz take down the Raptors (hopefully not the Heat) and wearing my own version of Wizznutz’ 98 bench shirt
Antonio & Deshawn & Jarvis & Antawn & Etan. I still believe.
As always for continuing coverage of the Wizards collapse, see the DC Sports Bog
I'm hot 'cause I'm fly/You ain't 'cause you not." Brutal and unassailable in its simplicity. Consider the reasoning, first, of just "I'm hot 'cause I'm fly": Mims is hot because he's fly. But it raises the question: Does being hot guarantee one's being fly? "You ain't 'cause you not" would seem to clear that up: ........
Truer words never spoken...from this article in the Village Voice
The article provides extensive graphic illustration of how one can be classified as alternatively either a) Fly/Hot or b) Not.
Including a flow chart..

and several Venn diagrams

Rockstar Joe found this surefire way to never lose your beer again at a party. The beer pager.
If you are somehow still a loyal Republican you may want to skip the rest of this week’s installment of the redonkulous links. But if you can stomach it, I guarantee you will be entertained...there is even an appearance by Snoop Dog on TV in Holland...check it
I know it is almost too easy to bash Bill O’Reilly. Sure it is kinda like mocking mentally challenged person for their SAT score, but he gives the hatas so much damn good material and in these next two stunning videos from the last week make it much easier to post Snoop Dog's critique in good conscience.

In THE FIRST VIDEO, Bill O’Reilly goes totally apeshit and gets into an insane screaming match, at one point I wondered if he was gonna go all UFC style and bust out the mixed martial arts ...incredibly the voice of reason in this battle is none other than former jackass Geraldo Rivera, who actually calls Bill on his BS and exposes him as a racist, protectionist, nonsensical lunatic, spouting on about law enforcement when really only looking for a way to bash brown people, This episode even provoked Olbermann to reward Rivera the actual Best person in the world last week.

In the next video, Bill-O doesnt go nearly as crazy, but still exposes himself as just as much of a non-reasoning bully, as he shouts down and cuts the mic of a retired Army Colonel who is actually speaking the truth to Bill. When Colonel Wright tries to explain to Bill that he needs to be careful in chastising the Iranians for "unprovoked acts of aggression", to be careful in not “ratcheting up” the rhetoric, and to act like a rational person instead of an insane lunatic warmonger. Bill-O goes on another childish rant and accuses her of "blaming America first," good one. I don’t think it is any coincidence that Britain listened to Colonel Wright in dealing with Iran, and as a result they were able to successfully negotiate the release of the hostages last week WITHOUT bombing innocent people all over the world and without looking like unhinged O'reillys.

After both of those instances, I think the most appropriate response to O’Reilly was given by Snoop Doggy Dogg on Dutch television (even though the Dutch host somehow has a much better grasp of the English language than either Bill-O or my boy Snoop)

Meanwhile the MC Karl Rove rapping video was all over the internets and the youtubes this week. I think John Stewart, channeling the Beastie Boys in a dead-on impersonation of old school Mike D, provides the best response. He may be a “fly MC” but he is still .....still Jeffrey Dahmer

Stewart is hot because he’s fly, Rove ain’t because he’s not. Simple logic, totally irrefutable. Again refer back to the Village Voice to see it broken down graphically
Anyway, maybe this post bashed Republicans a little too much (haha yeah right) but better be careful because Dick Cheney is often lurking in the bushes. No really ...he lurks...seriously...this is an actual video from a speech last week.
Who will be the FIRST to comment.