Monday, June 18, 2007

Flowers and old legionaires

Once again Agent Steinz, from the Washington Post’s D.C. Sports Bog, promotes and defends the Redonkulous Linker, this time defending our hero from the evil thieves at Mike and Mike In the Morning.
Speaking of brilliant sports bloggers, Unsilent Majority eloquently explained in Deadspin early last week why Gilbert’s announced decision to opt out of his contract was just a smart business decision and does NOT mean he is leaving:
Simply put, there's no reason for to go anywhere else. This is his home, it's where he's raising a family, it's where he's loved, and it's where he reigns supreme as The Black President (which makes him more powerful than Eleanor Holmes Norton) . And if does leave he knows that we'll find him. Remember, we're a bunch of crazy fuckers [with a cite to the crazy fuckers at Wizznutz]

Later in the week Gilbert personally and completely confirmed the thoughts of UM on his own blizzog.
Anyway, why would Arenas have signed a personalized jersey to the “R. Linker”if he planned on leaving us.
DC’s best pound-for-pound blogger, the DCeiver, has nailed my feelings exactly on the latest incarnation of total-whackjob, Perry Farrell. Yes Jane’s Addiction was great, but as I rediscovered in a recent Ron and Fez podcast, the man is a complete lunatic, Satellite Party will undoubtedly suck and DCeiver rightly explains why. Money quote:
Take this Satellite Party shit. To hear Farrell talk about it, it's like he's unlocked the Arc of the Covenant of something. He talks about his shitty band in these terms that you'd have to have ingested two huge Aaron Sorkin-loads of shrooms to even halfway believe. He tells interviewers that on UltraPayloaded, he's more or less created the music that will instantaneously unlock the mysteries of the celestial spheres and douse the listener in fluffy bunny rabbits and orgasm-inducing ambrosia and that the experience will be tantamount to seeing the face of God. In the first place, Fergie is a collaborator on this record, so you know this is just an impossible claim from jump, but sadly, his prize gimmick is some moldy old field recording of Jim Morrisson, saying only fuckadoo knows what. Christ, I'm surprised there isn't a whole room full of tapes with Morrisson blabbing on them--if they don't exist it's only because someone who loved him burned them.

DCeiver is harsh on the 90's icon, but the guy has got a point.
A few years ago, the geniuses at the Pentagon were actually planning a “Gay Bomb” to turn our enemies, well, gay. Dont believe me?...

Alex Blagg at Best Week Ever did some fine investigative reporting and found the schematics for the top secret gay bomb.
Interesting remix video of T-Pain's .Let me buy you a draaaank
After last weeks in depth discussion on the rise of Douchiness in our popular culture, I stumbled across this Manfred Man song playing somewhere. (check the video ) Hearing Mr. Man repeat the chorus about 20 times in the song (including 3 straight times to begin the joint, I became convinced that the subject of this ditty was proclaimed to be “wrapped up like douche.” After a minimal amount of digging around on the intertubes, my thoughts were confirmed by the Wikipedias.
Under the subheading "Deuce versus douche", I learned that the song was actually written by Bruce Springsteen and referenced to a duece, a '32 Ford Deuce Coupe. The song was then covered by Man and changed to 'revved up like a douche', "which is a feminine hygienic procedure." The Boss even attributed the popularity of the cover version to the repeated use of the douche wrapping. Nice.
Thanks to Fimoculous, here is the entire new Michael Moore, doc Sicko.
And don’t worry about watching it online, I remember Moore saying he doesnt mind the file sharing on teh internets. Since he doesn't mind, here is the full Farenheit 9/11

Monday, June 04, 2007

Skeptics Guide to the Douchebaggaverse

Another two week delay, but since I received no comments or emails regarding the lack of posting...I will just assume that nobody cared
Big psuedo-scientific news last week as the Loch Ness Monster was finally filmed terrorizing Scotland. At least according to CNN, whose breathless headline read “Fabled monster caught on video.” The text of the article was no less hysterical: “The Scottish media is skeptical of Nessie stories but Holmes' footage is of such good quality that even the normally reticent BBC Scotland aired the video on its main news program on Tuesday.” Ooooh I couldnt wait to see this high quality video so I found the Scottish newscast on the Gootube. The CNN article continued: “Loch Ness Monster watchers say is among the finest footage ever taken of the elusive mythical creature.” Ok, it is settled, “Loch Ness Monster watchers” are fucking idiots. The only thing shown in the video was a long black line moving through the water. This is what passes for a monster these days?

I knew the skeptics would have a field day with this nonsense, and the message board of my favorite skeptical podcast, Skeptics Guide to the Universe, did not dissapoint. Quickly a more suitable headline was created
Speaking of believing in stupid shit. has an excellent list of the top 10 celebrities whose belief in the alien Xenu are most disappointing. Jason Lee, Beck, Seinfeld....dagger.
Finally almost 15 years after high school, the lyrics to Yellow Ledbetter are explained on the gootube.
I have pretty much avoided the guy-in-basement-talking-into-webcam side of youtube, but this ol' skeptical bastard ranting about religion on about 30 podcasts kicks much ass
Resident Donkies(eys) Paparazzi Spooony D got himself in Gilbertology recently with a ton of Agent Zero and other Wizard-themed photoshops. If I really cared about this blog I'd procure his magician like services to fix up this damn thing again as with his brilliant rendering of Billy Donovan eating children - Coach K style - back in March of '06
But still have "edit me" links in the right margin. Give me a reason to care, I dare you.
Holy Shit The Bees Are All Dead
Matthew Mf-ing Yglesias linked to this highlarious and pseudo-intellectual examination of the modern day douchebag
He has seen the douchebag, and it is us.
The surprising thing about douchebag, which has become the current default term of disparagement—deployed with relish by everyone from Jon Stewart to every other blogger—is that most likely your grandfather used it too...Over time, the word has come to denote “somebody who can’t help but to be an asshole

Although the douchebag described in that article may be be me, at least I am not the type of dbag prominently featured on the Hot Chicks With Douchebags Blog
and I have yet to buy an douche cologne