Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Since that day my livin’ room’s been more comfortable



I applaud this poor guy for trying to make something out of a bad situation.

Sorry today's post is devoid of the fun and redonkulous links that usually occupy this space. My next post will get back to the good times that you all have to know and love. But for one day we gotta at least deal with this Hurricane, and feel for this poor bastard who is just tryin to sip on some Heineken's while is town vanishes.

Hurricane Katrina is awful beyond words, I cannot even begin to describe the pictures and video I have been looking at in the past couple days.
You could find ways to help, or show sympathy for those who have lost, but instead the “tough-on-crime” and “law-and-order-first” idiots over at the conservative “National Review” are calling for the scalps of the looters. Yes, I believe this is the first evacuation of a major US city since the civil war, but what these clowns seem most worried about are the looters who have grabbed a boombox or bottle of Absolut. Give me a fucking break

The city is a swimming pool, pardon me if I’m not worried about a misdemeanor burglary charge against a poor sap who stole a TV after his entire house and all of his personal belongings are washed away. The city will be un-liveable for months but I am supposed to be concerned about this guy who grabs a six-pack while he waits perched on his roof for a rescue copter to come save him.

Its seems like every conservative commentator on the “prestigious” NRO site has called for the lynching and beheading of the looters. Take a look.

Iain Murry quotes from his “college contemporary” who claims that the people taking jewellry (sic) and electronics “should all be f***ing shot, in my view

Meanwhile, head-NROer Jonah Goldberg favorably quotes an NRO reader who wishes Brian Williams would “call it as it is” by stating “"There're some looting scum, let's hope theNational Guard shoots them.”

Finally, Rich Lowry forgoes the old “I heard this from a reader/friend trick" and states that he himself applauds the Missippi governor for promising to deal with the looters “ruthlessly,” calling them “sub-human,” and teaching them “a lesson they wouldn't soon forget.”

This is pure idiocy from the leading online-conservative journal (big shocker I know).

These are the same pundits who want to keep our jails packed with non-violent offenders who were caught with a dime bag of marijuana or a single crack rock, instead of offering drug rehab. What a waste of resources and time. Don’t tell me that you have no sympathy for these looters, when we cant even imagine what they are going through right now as their city floats away.



Why don’t we take a look at the guy in the above picture again and imagine his plight, before we decide to shoot him, hang him, or “teach him a lesson.” Many of the people still stranded in New Orleans were told to evacuate days ago, but a bunch these poor stranded folks have no car or 40-ft yacht, and thus could not have very easily evacuate their homes. Also, imagine the plight of those car-less folks who have a sick or elderly person living among the other 10 people in their one bedroom apartment. It certainliy is not easy for those people to simply evacuate at the first news warnings of a flood. As a result, these people are stuck waiting around and hoping it doesnt hit them directly, and WHAM it does.

Now this poor sap in the picture has probably lost all of his possessions, his house, and may be missing a family member and you want to jail (or shoot) him for stealing some beer. Once again, give me a fucking break.

If you are poor your entire life, you live in the ghetto of New Orleans, you have no bank account, and the $500 in your shoebox just washed away in a flood, I personally give you permission to steal a few Heinekens while you ride out the storm. Drink up on me buddy, you have an excuse to swimlift that case of Natural Ice.

Look at his poor guy. He’s got Heinekens everywhere, even in his back pocket - just in case he makes it through all of the busket before the rescue boats come. (“Look man you got a Benz, I got a Busket.... A busket?! Gimme the Busket”) He is going soo bald on top of his head that he has decided to grow some long bushy mess in the back to throw off those who are trying to figure it out. His busket of beer is so heavy that he cant even grab the probably delicious and soggy batch of chocolate chip cookies floating right next to him. Spare me if I don’t want to rebuild the Court and the Jail before the rest of the city, just so that I can try or execute this poor bastard.

Kick it Ice Cube: “Shooters, looters, Now I got a laptop computer.”

UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE
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UPDATE: Headlines like this make it a little tougher write off most of the looters as people just trying to survive.
“Mayor Ray Nagin ordered 1,500 police to leave their search-and-rescue mission Wednesday to stop the increasingly-hostile looting,”
This stuff is bad and needs to stop no questions asked. I still think that MOST of what the media is labeling as looting, is really just people trying to get enough supplies to get through the disaster, but as in every situation, there are those who are taking advantage and need to be stopped. When the looting is actually impeding rescue efforts to such a degree as quoted above, drastic measures need to be taken.

But I still disagree that those drastic measures include shooting at every “looter” coming out of a grocery store with some diet pepsi. The majority of the “looters” are not the ones we should be concerned with, there are just a few criminals who were probably criminals before and after the flood. It just pissed me off this morning, that the right wing websites were advancing idea of shooting all the people trying to get clothing from a sporting goods store or food from a grocery.

Maybe I came out to broadly as a “Defender of the lawless looters.” If you think I did, I apologize -- and I agree people stealing from homes and jewlry stores really need to be stopped, but I just got enraged by actually reading mainstream right-wing whacko websites and their racist calls for the murder of looters.

Dont believe that racisim played a part? check out this cartoon




I found this on a simple search for looting and beer on Technorati. Some racist pile of shit nutjob blogger makes a horrible cartoon and it is immediately linked to favorably by mainstream righties like this guy
who is loved by another big time wingnut Lashawn Barber


and they simply label as a “a Photoshop pic that will probably draw some comment”

No, it is a racist horrible cartoon made by a miserable excuse for a person. I hope whoever made that crap has their house looted tonight

That is the kind of stuff that puts me on the side of people they call "looters"
I certainly don’t want to be the Defender of the people who are actually doing real looting but we just have to be real careful about who we are labeling as "looters" and who is merely getting supplies for their family. Most of the people that rightwingnutjobs call looters are people trying to survive while they get no help from the NAtional Guard (who is mostly in Iraq).

See the difference?

Monday, August 29, 2005

Live-Blogging from my new Law Office/Ninja Dojo:














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Start preparing for the Donkies(eys) takeover. With the authorities cracking down on Bit Torrent, a new network has risen to the top, eDonkey, seriously - its called eDonkey.
Really, I'm not joking.

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Nene Hilaro Hilario-us link of the day

Did you know that if you lose the keys to your car a locksmith can simply make you another set -- all you have to do is promise that its your car and he will confirm the VIN and make the keys for you. Seriously, it happened to my buddy last weekend, and he reports that it was just that easy....well...maybe not just that easy for him...there were a few other mishaps along the way...but eventually was just that easy ...here’s the story.

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Googlemania

For all of you that have your IM blocked at work, you fools need to hop onto Google Talk – You can find me at Myname@gmail.com . Gtalk also has a phone-over-internet feature that allows the Donkies worldwide to communicate. You expat Donkies in Australia and Sri Lanka need to get up with this


Via Spoony:
And for you Donkies training to join a Donkies athletic team, this google maps pedometer is like magic. It lets you plot out any course and instantly see the distance you will travel.

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Those google products are the bananas. And lest you miss the point, I will spell it out like Gwen does b-a-n-a-n-a-s, in one of the most baffling (and I say annoying) pieces of music of the modern age.

“The 'shit' we surmise, is what she calls the exercises she’s teaching the other girls.”

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In keeping with my theme of finding the Redskins trashed in local San Jose newspapers and other venues, I was in the waiting room at America’s Best (err Cheapest) Contacts and Eyeglasses and found this nugget in the Sporting News.

Fed Ex Field ranked 26th in the NFL

26. FedEx Field, Washington
This is an abomination that lacks the convenience and style of its predecessor, RFK Stadium. You get the feeling this place is more about money than football. When you're here, you feel like a pebble in the Grand Canyon. Everything is overdone, and the corporate presence is oppressive -- there's a Hooters on site, for crying out loud. The stadium is in the middle of nowhere, and traffic is a nightmare. But trying to park makes traffic seem like a dream.

An abomination? That is a pretty rough assessment. Sadly, true.

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Dmacaveli would probably have been pissed at that ranking if he was still on the team, but as you could have learned today on his own personal website, Darcarien (Spurrierese) McCants was cut by the Skins last night.

Many people on the internets are unclear as to why D-rastaferian has his own personal website or such a vast array of nicknames. I personally think that, like Gwen, he’s the shit - or something like that.

Personal favorite nickname listed on the site: YA BOI. Not to be confused with sk8ter boi or holla-at-ya-boy.


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Just listened to the new Kanye West album start to finish. Damn that arrogant bastard. So fuckin’ easy to hate him. Too bad he is right, his "shit" is by far the best thing hip hop has going right now.

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And to spare you right-wingnuts, I will forgo my traditional Bush bashing conclusion, just remember Karl Rove, I have not forgotten.

Thursday, August 25, 2005

Everyone start commenting.

I never realized that my blog was set so that you had to be a blogger member to comment. It must get set up that way by default. F that, I wanna hear from the peoples. So if you've read this jounks before and haven't commented in the past, start commenting now, or the Spaghetti Monster will damn you to hell.

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Jet pilot for a day, washed his sins away, Loves to see the Rangers play

Although we disagree about just about everything political, I have to agree with the majority of Czabn’s brilliant rant on gas prices, at least as it applies to the people I know complaining about the prices. I am tired of young professionals crying about gas prices while at the same time buying $5 coffees. That shit is free in everyone’s office coffee pot, but you still buy it, so don't cry to me about having to hit up the Exxon. Also, I know I am certainly buying a hybrid or some other alternative fuel jounks for my next car. If you want to buy a gas guzzler, thats fine, but zip it about the gas prices dick. Here is his post in full:

“Everybody needs to shut the F up about gas prices. Everybody screams like a little bitch because what? Gas doesn’t cost $1.09 like it was 1985? Get over it. Adjusted for inflation, gas is cheaper now that it was then. Yeah, inflation, bitch. Ever heard of it? Stuff costs more. When people say gas costs too much, I always ask: “Oh really? What do you think a fair price is?” Nobody ever has a good answer to that one. Should a gallon be 50 cents less? Maybe. But all these stories about how much of a terrible “impact” it is making on the “poor” is a bunch of crap. [This is the part I actually don't agree with - I can kind of understand it when poor people complain, but it is still not nearly as bad as its made out to be] These stories assume that the “poor” otherwise live a perfectly disciplined economic life. When you see somebody crying about high gas costs on a local TV report, I bet you can find used lottery scratch offs, packs of smokes, and cable TV in their house. Gas costs more, you pricks. Drive less, get a hybrid, save money elsewhere, or f’ing walk. I don’t care, and nobody does either.”

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Movie executives are finally admitting that they are making shitty movies that only idiots would like. I know I’m not waiting in line to see movies about killer planes or Marky Mark gettin revenge for his dead mother. I'm much more likely to go see the Aristocrats, which has probably never gone near any movie execs.

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Golden fiddle has an amazing My Morning Jacket cover today of Erykah Badu’s “Tyrone”,
which I have been playing over and over again all day at work. For my money, MMJ is the best outdoor, summer, drinking music on the planet, too bad im stuck in an office in the beautiful Golden Triangle.

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Happy birthday shout outs today to 3 of my favorite people: Cal Ripken, Dave Chapelle, and most importantly Steve Rome - Steve Rome.

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Big shouts to Spoony D for downing 10 beers in a hot second and single handedly defeating the entire opposing team in a game of flip cup last night, after the brothers pitched the Donkies to another win in their undefeated season. Money move Spoony, money move.

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In serious/boring news

Radical cleric Pat Robertson has called for the assassination of the President of Venezuela, simply because Chavez” 1) has oil, and 2) hates the Bush Administration. Yeah, thats a pretty sane position for the leader of the religious right. Pat Robertson is the same radical insane cleric who blamed feminists and gays for the attacks on 9/11, and was told by god that “George Bush has the favor of heaven.” This guy is a complete wackjob who should have no influence in this, or any other, country. When are these radical religious right clowns going to lose the massive amount of power that this country has granted them. Next you will see some Republicans on TV denouncing Robertson as a wacko but we all know that he is now in the mainstream of the Republican party, the leader of the Christian Coalition, and has a huge influence on Bush. To quote from the Chewbacca defense: It does not make sense!

All that aside, while Robertson’s comments were INCREDIBLY stupid, I don’t agree that it should be illegal to say what Robertson said or even that what he suggested should necessarily be illegal. Currently it is against U.S. law for the government to assassinate foreign leaders, but is that a good policy? Someone explain to me why it would have been illegal to assassinate Saddam Hussein but it is legal to drop bombs all over his country and kill innocent people (and also ok to kill him by accident as long as you aren’t directly targeting him in an assassination plot). Under those circumstances, it seems as though targeted assassination is a lot more justified than traditional war. * P.S. I seem to remember my former law professor, Raven-Hansen, writing a law review article back when I started law school in 1998-1999 proposing a change in the current laws to allow the assassination of Bin Laden, guess we shoulda listened to him back then. )

Monday, August 22, 2005

You can Haight me now, but I won’t stop now.

As usual, I will start with the personal recap (feel free to skip this part) and then get it on with redonk links.

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I have yet another excuse for my week without posting: my summer 2005 bluest-of-the-blue-state tour. The tour continued last week in California, as this time I traveled to the bluest place on earth the Bay Area. I had no need to once again drive through Jesusland this time as we simply flew over the red states on Independence Air

Our first stop was Kristen’s place in the Haight. I once thought that this neighborhood was purely for Dead Heads and Phish Phans but the place had tons of character and was perfect for our first night out in SF. The first big plus was that there was no need to change out of our airplane clothes, as there are plenty of non black-pants-non-$12-drink bars in the Haight. While pre-gaming, we were debriefed about the Haight night-life by our hosts. We were told: “The kids here think its cool to dress like homeless people and ask you for some money, you can tell by their shoes” immediately followed by “almost every person on the street will try to sell you some weed, if you don’t want any just keep walking.” Well it sure didnt take long for our hosts to be proven correct, upon turning the first corner from Golden Gate Park past the McDonalds and onto Haight Street, the very first group of hooded-sweatshirt kids began to chant “got any change, any cash?” Upon being denied they moved on to their second line of inquiry: “nuggets? need nuggets? Want nuggets?” I know that Dori loves chicken fingers, nuggets and fries, but we didnt need to break out the urban dictionary to know that they weren’t peddling the tasty fried stuff with dipping sauce. Mmm nuggets.

Ok, so fake-homeless drug dealers with McDonalds code words doesn’t make the most endearing introduction to any neighborhood but it was funny the first time, and the rest of the street/area actually turned out to be pretty damn cool. On a side note, I also discovered that I’m pretty down with lesbians. No, I don’t mean watching them in movies and magazines, I’ve known that my whole adult life. I mean that while in the Haight I got into some good conversations regarding indie movies, the Sundance film festival, international soccer, and the comparative hotness of the U.S. Women’s soccer team. Not things that I usually discuss with girls in Georgetown so it was a fun change of pace.

Anyway, while sipping a beer in the Magnolia brew-pub I saw another common variation of the drunkard that I did not expect in the hippie/hispter land of Haight-Ashbury. In a brewpub decorated like a psychedelic mushroom and I'm assuming named after a Dead song, these people indicated that they had put down their bongs long enough to take part in a semi-sporting event that involved wearing matching brightly colored t-shirts. I think many of you know where I’m going with this - thats right - I spotted an actual WAKA kickball team in the heart of the Haight. So those DC bloggers concerned that kickballers are taking over all the bars in DC, consider yourself warned, they are takin over the bars from coast to coast, even mushroom infused brewpubs in the original land of hippiedom.

The rest of the trip wasn’t as culturally interesting as the Haight, but was just as much fun. I hung with the younger cousins and showed them both sides of the cultural spectrum from our money hotel in San Jose ato the bay area's version of oooocean city - the tatooed Raider Nation that is Santa Cruz.

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ON TO THE LINKS
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Drunk Willie Style - Is this you?

This newcomer of a blogger has been doing his BWS/DWS routine for years, and in a recent post compared Dewey to an adult Disneyland. Now I believe he may have had a brush with another unkowing DC blogger and that they may cross-blogged during the act of BWS’s attack.

This random DC blogger recounts a night in Dewey beach and Mr. McDonkerton has pointed out the high likelihood that Drunk Willie Style is the anonymous drunkard in question in the second half of the post

A close reading of the text reveals many hints to the possible identification of DWS:

“I find myself almost literally swept off my feet as he decides that we're going to dance”
‒ Drunk Willie Style? - check

“He kept telling me I was the most beautiful girl in the bar”
‒ Drunk Willie Style? - check

“Of course he starts trying to kiss me and I push him away”
‒ Drunk Willie Style? - check

“He jokingly calls me a tease”
‒ Drunk Willie Style? - check

“I guess he was curious if I had given him the right number because he didn't wait long to call. hahaha).”
‒ Drunk Willie Style? - check

This last one may be a dead giveaway, because while almost all guys ponder the proper number of days to wait before calling a girl after getting her number (2, 3? see, Swingers) DWS only debates whether to wait until after he has left the bar or not, before making the return call. This money move often shortens the standard waiting time from standard-guy-method three days to DWS-method of three minutes. This is a signature move of DWS that I have never seen practiced elsewhere. DWS, if you are out there, speak up and let us know if it is you?

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Donkies are ruling once again. Donkie soccer undefeated, Donkie kickball undefeated, Donkie football - slowly forming. And now we get an excellent and inexplicable defense of Donkey parn from craigslist. Im pretty sure that this Donkeys post is totally unrelated to the Donkies but you be the judge.

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Despite idiotic politicians like Bill Frist jumping on the creationism err intellingent design bandawagon, The spaghetti monster is starting to gather some mainstream press.

I guess Frist felt bad about finnally making the correct decision on permitting government funding of stem cell research and wanted to balance it out with some anti-science. But dont worry Ragu monster, I still want to believe.



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Say it aint so Coach Joe:

I really hope that the Spaghetti monster helps Coach Gibbs turn the Skins around, because they are quickly becoming a national joke. Exhibit A is the is the following article from the San Jose Mercury News, delivered to my hotel room on Saturday morning:

“HEARD THIS ONE?
“The Washington Redskins aren't a Mickey Mouse operation. Not exactly. Daniel Snyder -- whose continued presence ensures that, no matter how bad it gets, John York will not be the worst owner in the NFL -- is mounting a campaign to take over Six Flags Inc., which runs dozens of theme parks. . . . The implications are obvious: If the takeover is successful all Six Flags parks will include a ride known as Joe Gibb’s Offense. Customers will move 3 yards at a time in 1980s-era vehicles.

This is getting redonkulous. Taking shots at Snyder has been fair game for years but NOW everyone is tearing into coach Joe. This is getting real bad, “Like Vinnie Chase and the crew turning down court side Lakers seats because the Wizards are playing”, bad.

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Does this story really seem far-fetched to anyone who has dealt with Comcast customer service. While I have never been formally addressed as “Bitch Dog” (is that redundant?) as this woman has, Comcast's service has been bad enough for me to happily switch to Starpower/RCN and never look back.

Best part of the story: "I was like you got to be freaking kidding me," said Govan, 25. "I was so mad I couldn't even cuss.""

Sunday, August 14, 2005

The Leprechaun 5: The Spaghetti Incident

Sorry for the light posting lately. I have actually had a few people come up to me and ask why there have been no new entries for a while. Hopefully, this post is redonkulous enough to keep you suckas satisfied.

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I’m back on the RDL after another eventful weekend, the centerpiece of which was the Crazy Leprechaun’s bachelor party on Saturday. Once again, I secured a 40 person bus, this time for a trip to the shit-hole-of-fun that is Atlantic City, New Jersey. Big props to big Joe for getting the group together. By 11:30 a.m. the keg was tapped, food was on the grill, and a whole bunch of old Laurel heads were in the house. By 12:30 we were on the road, and Leprechaun was already buzzing and sporting his fresh ultra-classy “rub me lucky balls” t-shirt made just that morning. For once in my life I didn’t give a shit about being stuck in Beltway traffic. When you’re on a bus with a tapped keg, tons of liquor, and twenty old-school friends, the dreaded DC traffic is finally tolerable. We actually toasted to the thought of being stuck in Wilson bridge traffic.

While losing money and watching a Leprechaun get abused on stage by strippers with leather belts is always fun, the highlight of the trip had to be just drinkin’ with all the old-school Laurel peeps on the bus while watching old video footage of the Leprechaun and friends in action. I noticed many of the other poor souls stuck on the beltway were trying to get a view of the footage being played on the drunk-bus TV’s.

In the best video episode of the bus ride, I dusted off an old gem involving a hidden camera, much Tequila, a massaging Leprechaun, drunk college girls, and the highlarious knuckle-cracking-preliminary-move -- all occurring south of the border. Hey! I’m talking about south of the MEXICAN border you sick bastards, It wasn’t that kind of tape (well not entirely that kind of tape). Although the “south-of-the-border-leprechaun-massage” DOES sound like something that could have been purchased by the cousin for $25 at one of the sleazy A.C. establishments, that is not what I am referring to either. (I think it may be the first cousin to the Roman War Helmet).

Once we finally de-boarded the bus, after narrowly avoiding all the potential conflicts and political brouhahas between the urban dwellers and the Fredneckian contingent, we were ready to hit the casino floor. I’m not so sure that the pit boss’s enjoyed everyone repeatedly yelling “rub the Leprechaun’s lucky balls dammit” before every spin of the roulette wheel, but it did seem to bring good luck for at least the first hour of gambling. Eventually, we all somehow made it back to the bus before it departed (all except for one cracky who was picked up while running down the road and flailing his arms) and we arrived back in Bethesda at some point on Sunday morning.


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Now for some random redonkulous links that you all have come to know and love:

I wholeheartedly agree that the Kansas school-board should teach the scientific theory of the Flying Spaghetti Monster alongside both Evolution and Intelligent Design. Who are they to deny my belief in the existence in the spaghetti monster, it is after all, just another competing "theory." No different that Bush's personally endorsed intelligent design, Right?


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Last week the Skins decided to start revoking the season tickets of any fans caught selling their seats on ebay.

Great PR move Danny-Boy Snyder. After taking away my right to park in the Mall lot and making everyone pay an extra $25 to park, taking away my right to walk on the sidewalks near fed-ex field, selling people seats directly behind structural beams, trying to build a fantasy football team instead of an NFL team, and requiring fans to buy season tix only with the Redskins® credit cards...is it any wonder why I would rather watch the games at home on the HiDef big screen, than travel to my beautiful homeland of PG County.

This latest ebay-move is just pushing me one tiny step closer to shelling out for the purple jersey and some crab bombs. I know coach Gibbs has asked all fans to pray for Lavar Arrington’s knee to heal quickly, but the Spaghetti Monster has personally informed me that he is too busy dealing with all of the wars and destruction in the world to concern himself with the patella of an overpaid linebacker.

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Final quick links:

---Maddox has nice take on blogs.

-- Best conclusion to a movie review ever?
“Speaking in my official capacity as a Pulitzer Prize winner, Mr. Schneider, your movie sucks.”

---Bush, too busy to meet with the mother of a fallen US solder. Instead he continues to vacation in Texas, exercise for at least 2 hours every day like he does in DC while "working," and get to bed every night around 9:00 p.m. He says because it is important to keep a “balanced life.” Ooook.

Thursday, August 04, 2005

Big like a pickle, I'm still gettin' paid

In my mini-debate with Rambler earlier this week, he took offense to my characterization of RCR as a hispster blog. I then defined “hipster blog” in my comments as generally those blogs that discuss indie music and movies, DC/gentrified neighborhoods, cheap/retro beer, other hipster blogs (deceiver, etc.), liberal/libertarian politics, and dive bars instead of McFaddens 1223. This is nothign to be ashamed of, as these blogs are much more readable than the standard reading fare for most post-college male professionals, and the item that I have dubbed the single most likely reason for the downfall of the american male, Maxim magazine. In fact, Hipster blogs may be the opposite of the "articles" in Maxim, and that makes them pretty damn good in my book. (For all those who claim that they get Maxim for the pictures, dont you have the internets and paaarno?). Anyway, RCR then suggested that I write a you-might-be-a-hipster-blog-if post, but I think that about covered it. Anyway, I couldn’t do any better than the commenters on Stereogum who tackled an animal very very similar to the hipster blogger the “indie-yuppie”. Some of my favorite definitions of the indie-yuppie include

---- You might be an indie-yuppie if the new Bloc Party LP really helped you get through those last few days to make sure you met your billable hours requirement at the end of the month.
Posted by: Justin at April 12, 2005 06:30 PM
(((replace Bloc Party with about 20 other indie rock CD's and this one hits home for me)))

----You might be an indie yuppie if Rolling Stone, The New York Times and your favorite local record store have been replaced in the last 3 years by Pitchfork Media, Salon.com and the iTunes store. Posted by: VeraCruz at April 12, 2005 06:55 PM
(((((Salon is better than most newspapers but I refuse to buy the subscription)))

----You might be an indie yuppie if you love Death Cab and Bright Eyes and live in Newport Beach with your parents and drive around in Range Rover while homoerotic sparks fly between you and your semi-adopted, brother-from-the-wrong-side-of-the-tracks. (And you date a lesbian because she's soooo alternative and gets you free tickets to The Killers.) Posted by: Jenny at April 12, 2005 07:33 PM
((((hah)))))))

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If you really wanna know about a Redonkulous Linker (already regretting that name by the way) I might as well point you to Double Viking. The Duce Culpepper has been on a roll lately and has pointed me to tons of hot links that need to be reposted.


DV got the goods on current real worlder/cracky Melinda gettin her freak on at bar. This sloot needs to be included in every challenge from here on out.

Then in response to McDonkerton’s positng that Mike Jone published his own cell phone number, DV discvered the fact that his marketing plan backfired when he received a cell phone bill of $250,000.00. Mike Jones might wanna rethink the Mike Jones strategy of putting Mike Jones' cell phone number in Mike Jones' song because it ends up causing a large bill that Mike Jones will have to pay with the credit card of Mike Jones. Who?


I went with the girlfriend last week to see Wedding Crashers since I could not drag her to Murderball. The movie turned out to be high-larious, despite the sappy/stupid ending that tried to make it into a real romantic comedy, instead of a old-school-like romp. Anyway we got there during the opening credits and had to sit in the first few rows. From that vantage point, one of the most astounding things about the movie was Owen Wilson’s F’d up nose. DoubleViking now points me to this crazy blog with an in-depth analysis of that crazy ass nose . Humpty Hump may use a word like luptid, but he's got nothin on Owen Wilson.

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Tonight I will be hitting up CEIBA for restaurant week. From what I’ve read, most of their menu is available for R-week, and they got the best Mojito’s in town. These are my three early favorites for entrees, but one thing I don’t understand is why the descriptions underneath the items all contain items that are not included in the name of the entree, does this mean that jumbo lumb crab comes with the Plaintain Atalantic Salmon, Craziness? And what the hell is Fufu Mash??

1) Sugar Cane Skewered Jumbo Shrimp
Smashed Avocado, Chipolte Barbeque Sauce, Pineapple Salsa

2) Crispy Green Plantain Atlantic Salmon
Jumbo Lump Crab, Sweet Corn, Tomatillo, Boniato Puree, Tamarind Tartar

3) Blackened Yellowfin Tuna
Coconut Shrimp, Fufu Mash, Curried Costa Rican Pineapple Tapioca

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Anybody catch the latest stunning move from our Prez-nint. During this “war on terrorism,” he will use an interesting strategy. The 5 WEEK VACATION!! You gotta be kidding me.

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Looks like the Sports Guy had the same reaction as I did to the Miami Heat trade/robbery. How the F’ were the Heat able to get ‘Toine Walker, White Chocolate, and James Posey for an aging poo poo platter. Yes, he even called him a poo poo platter.

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Finally, I dont know jack about cars except that if I press the gas it is supposed to go forward. I had take my car to the shop this week when that one basic element of driving was not working correctly, but are all these things supposed to go wrong at the same time? And should my mechanic really describe each of them as being "shot." Thats a little harsh isnt it.

1) crank shaft position sensor - shot
2) fuel tanks ending unit - shot
3) fuel pump - shot
3) rack and pinion - shot
4) power steering reservior - shot (can a reservoir be shot)
5) spark plugs - need all new ones

Pretty nice luxury car I have.

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Music heard while writing this post: The Rentals - Return of the Rentals; The Pernice Brothers - Discover a Lovelier You; Son Volt - Okemah and the Melody of Riot