Friday, September 29, 2006

This website's updated by Witches, witches, witches and me.

Here is undoubtedly the best take on the unfortunate death of the Crocodile Hunter, via Norm Macdonald on the Daily Show:

Crocodile voice: "Man, he was taunting me with a stick, I could have eaten him and his fucking kid"

Hated by Pitchfork, but considered brilliant by me, Ryan Adams has updated his website and replacing all of his amazing alt-country songs on the first few pages, are the new rap stylings of MC Ryan Adams. I must repeat ...brilliant
“Awww shit, look who got a website”...
The main-page track contains shouts to witches, Anna Farris, 2003, Kevin Bacon, and Waterworld 3. Props to stereogum for preserving the song in all of its glory. Stereogum 2002, bitches, Anna Farris represent indeed.

I may have listened to this "song" 8 times in the last hour.
New gawker music blog, Idolator, tracks how Weird Al released a geek-centric parody video online and became the most blogged about person in music last week. White & Nerdy is all about geeky internet culture and was perfectly positioned to create a blog tsunami.

But the best part of Idolator’s article was the inclusion of Weird Al's version of R.Kelly epic song, set in a drive-thru instead of a closet. I DON’T EVEN LIKE LIVER!.
Soon we will not even need TVs at all. Already sites like scour You Tube for the highlights of some of the best shows on TV.
The feature where they select the 10 best skits is one of my favorite versions of TV-on-the-internet.
10 best will ferrell
10 best Chapelle
10 best jackass
Throw george allen down the well. See if you can spot George Allen at this classic Borat concert.
High-larious interpretation of sean the paul. It all makes sense now. Fishead!!!
Finally, I will demonstrate just how [un]impressive Mark Brunell's record setting day was. Courtesy of Steve Czaban and we have the following in-depth look at Brunell vs. the Texans in all of its (semi)glory.

Based on their research we can see that 11 of his 24 completions did not cross the line of scrimmage and the first 9 passes totaled negative five yards through the air. Wow.

Below is the work of Czaban and Scott Linn
"Mark Brunell had a bang-up day against the Texans, didn’t he guys? While I am certainly happy, it needs to be noted the relative puny-ness of the passes. Not as a knock, but just as facts.
12 of his 24 completions were to running backs or tight ends.
And 11 of his passes DID NOT CROSS the line of scrimmage!
Here’s the breakdown, courtesy of my film watching buddy and radio colleague Scott Linn.
Note: “+/-“ refers to yards beyond or behind the line of scrimmage in the air. Run after catch is not noted here."

-2 Portis
-1 Moss
+3 Lloyd
+1 Cooley
-5 Randle El
0 Sellers
-2 Sellers
+3 Portis
-2 Cooley
+7 Betts
+6 Moss
+17 to Randle El (NOTE: This catch was wiped out by a Skins penalty, but must be noted, the pass was a STONE COLD interception, that was flat out dropped by a Texan, and then caromed to Randle El.)
-4 Cooley
+26 Patten (NOTE: A good strong throw, but only because he had nothing to lose at end of half. Also threw it high, and nearly got him killed. FWIW.)
+3 Lloyd
+6 Randle El
-3 Moss
+2 Sellers
-5 Betts
+2 Moss
+6 Lloyd
+6 Moss
-2 Moss
+2 Cooley
-4 Betts
"Now again, I’m not knocking a gameplan that works, and this one did. But let’s not get too far ahead of ourselves and think this will work against most decent (or better) teams"

Friday, September 15, 2006

I called you liar, but how right you were

As predicted everywhere, the most popular channel on youtube - webcam girl lonleygirl15 - was a complete fake. All it took was the NY Times, LA Times, and some good myspace detective work to out her. Once the myspace detectives found her out, it was not long before her personal pictures got posted on livejournal and youtube, and by last night the real lonelygirl was inexplicably dancing with Tucker Carlson on Jay Leno and Youtube. Ahhh the internets.
You want donkey sports, these are donkey sports.

After a big win in our opening game last week, donkies football wants to practice this Saturday at 9 am. What the fuck? Practice? Not a game, practice. Not the game, not a game....practice. Tell 'em Iverson.

Now on his 23rd version of the apology, Senator George "Macaca" Allen, is still attempting to excuse his mocking of anyone darker than me, and his history of displaying the confederate flag. So as a further attempt to show his turnaround, George Allen has hosted a rally (no sheets on the head this time, its not his usual kind of rally). Everyone come see George Allen's brown people outreach rally. What a freaking idiot. If you're in VA, vote Jim Webb.
As pointed out by Steregum, the latest battleground in the east-coast west-coast hip hop battles has been revealed..... flip flops. I am not shitting you, the thugs are now battling over the appropriateness of flip flops. flip flops.
My guess for the next internet phenomenon after Lonelygirl is the girl with the huge teeth from the snorg tees ads on myspace. I thought I was the first one on this bandwagon, but apparently there is already a fansite for snorgtees girl and they have tracked down her myspace page
I will now try to close each post with a music video. If my laptop had the ability to sing it would probably sound and look like this. .

Some guy programmed this Grandaddy video on an old school Apple II from 1979 and posted it on his website. Then Grandaddy approved it as the official video for the song. While I admit that most people would not even label this electronic mess a "song," I really like it for some reason.
My hero Stephen Colbert has picked up on Senator Macaca's Ethnic Rally: